Affection Inspections

Well, I have to start somewhere don't I?

I'm itching to just talk about the things that I intend to do, but there's no certainty I'll actually be able to do it, and I don't want to set such high expectations for myself only to miss the mark and crumble under the pressure so I guess I'm starting with a half-baked personal diary-style post. It's a start at least, and that is what matters.

So, I suppose to begin the discussion on love and romance it's only fair that I show you precisely where I'm coming from no? All science is biased, this is far from a science, so what exactly are my biases?

Well for starters, I'm wholly kink and queer friendly. All are expressions of love, affection or desires, in some shape or form. I love and support furries and their art, though I don't quite consider myself one. I love me some good ole yaoi and yuri and OT3s or other poly relationships and I love queerplatonic relationships just as much! (Ahhh the blurry line between romance and friendships♥). There are some things out there I don't think I'll ever really understand why people like it or are into it, but I'm a big believer in let people enjoy what they want to enjoy, so long as it's not causing active tangible harm to others (making others uncomfortable does not count, sorry.)

But what about me, you might wonder, what are the strange and bizarre things that I'm into? Well, given the nature of this publication, I hope you stick around to find out! But here are some grounding traits to get us started.

For one, I'm not into much of anything in actual practice. I'm somewhere along the sliding scale of asexual, and while I do have some sexual drive and desire, it does not come up all too often, at least, not as often as it seems to for most others.

What I do like is theory. Many of my most avid fascinations in romance are things that I like in theory rather than in actual practice. Like cannibalism for example! Obviously I don't like it in as an actual "romantic" thing. If someone goes around eating others for a twisted sense of "love" then I am fully supporting their arrest (of course, ideally they'd get help but the systems we live in...) Yet, there are two contradicting forces in romantic cannibalism, the destruction of your beloved, and the ability to be able to take them into yourself and hold them in a way another person would never be able to do. Ah, it makes me get all giddy at the ideas of conflict and toxic possessiveness just thinking about it! I'll get more into it (and why vore doesn't quite scratch my itch) in some later post, perhaps, but until then, I suppose I should acknowledge that I tend to prefer straight romances. Not that I don't read queer romance, (again, I do love me some good yaoi or yuri!) but because I'm a woman, who's attracted to men, I do tend to enjoy reading about those kinds of romantic situations, even if the characterization of men can be a bit.... well, limited, sometimes. It is changing though! I do love to see it, but it does make it difficult to find something good.

I tend to read romance manga or manhwa and occasionally read romance novels if I can stomach the story, or if I have the time, but most of my reading consumption comes from the internet's favourite: Fanfiction! Lacking the need for character introductions and getting straight into the action and conflict and emotional turmoil, I find it way easier and faster to sink my teeth into a good fanfic than I do reading published novels. I really do wanna do some more novel reading (and I'm open to suggestions!), but I just don't have the time sometimes and my bad procrastination habit doesn't really help. Besides all this reading though, I also watch anime, and play light novels or dating-sim video games! I don't tend to watch much live-action stuff (though I know there are some good ones there!) perhaps later down the line, I could ask you for a recommendation or two! (not right now though I don't wanna start a tv series while I'm so busy. It's so difficult to stop in the middle of the show when you don't always have a reassurance that you'll be brought right back to where you were!)

I also write romance. Namely romantic fanfiction, though I do sometimes write non ship-fics as well. Maybe one day I'll publish a romance novel of some sort, but I doubt it'd be any time soon unfortunately.

Oh! also, I've never been in a relationship before! I'm what all those relationship psychologists call "never paired". Maybe I'll find someone eventually but it's not exactly at the top of my priorities right now, hahahaha.

If you're thinking that all of this makes me seem less and less like an expert, well that's great! I'm not an expert, and this is not meant to be the publishings of an expert sharing their hard earned knowledge with the rest of the world. This is the earning. I'm not here to share what I know, I want to find out more and more and more, and as I find things out, I'll share them here, so that hopefully other people can make comments about these things, and correct me, or add to my knowledge.

I want to figure out more about this, and I hope you'd join me in this journey.

Welcome to the Website

Oh, you've come to see my website! How wonderful! Hello!

while I'm posting this on Substack, I've also been tinkering with making my own website as you can see here. Here, there'll be a few more effects on the text; like the wavy text you saw on the word cannibalism earlier. Cool right?! I didn't come up with that myself but it was still a bit of a struggle to wrangle it into this website so I could use it! If you wanna see the actual creator, as well as the actual creators for a lot of these things, check the little recipt to the right. You can scroll through the text! On top of that, there's a mug that you can click to view some other sub-websites I've got going. And to the left of the mug is the heartinkwell! You can use the inkwell to write up a comment to me, if you'd like. Though maybe using an inkwell is a bit too much of a hassle... Well, if you want something shorter and quicker (or if you wanna chat with others who have been to this website) you can borrow my old phone to the right there. On the Left side, you can see my journal! I'll probably put a shortened version of this there later on (when I get it working!!) to help new people navigate there when I start posting more articles. Above that, there's the archive for all my old articles with a few little extra things in the margins here and there. It's sorted from oldest to newest, so there might be a bit of scrolling needed to get where you wanna go, but there should also be some links at the top of the page to help you navigate there (hopefully that doesn't break!).

Ah, I almost forgot to mention. Moving text can sometimes be hard to read, especially with some of the effects I have. If you hover your mouse over the text, you can stop the animation so you can read it easily. Sometimes multiple animations will stop when you hover over one piece of text, while others will need you to hover over each item to pause them. It's just because some of the effects use Javascript and others don't. Although, sometimes, perhaps that ability to pause will be disabled on purpose........ well who knows! It doesn't really matter right now.

I hope you'll stick around to explore for a while. If not, I hope to see you again soon! I don't know how to post updates or set up an RSS feed on my own website yet, so you'll need to subscribe to my Substack for notifications, but until this theoretical next update, I wish you well❤